Thinking of Friends as Kind Mothers

The Purpose Of This Practice

  •  Increase trust of others by creating a sense of kinship.
  •   Increase love for others by creating a sense of gratitude.
  •   Reduce feelings of divisiveness and us vs. them.

STEP ONE: Please follow the “First Invite Love In” meditation on page xx before you begin this guided meditation.

STEP TWO: Please follow the instructions below for the central part of this compassion practice.

1. First, bring to mind a friend or someone you like very much, that you have good feelings about. It doesn’t have to be a perfect relationship. It may not even be someone you know personally. This person could be a man or a woman. It doesn’t matter. Whoever it is, just think about this person and bring them into the forefront of your mind.

2. The next thing you are going to do is consider or just pretend for the sake of this exercise that there is such a thing as a past life. You don’t have to believe in past lives in order to follow this meditation. We are just playing with your ability of your mind to imagine things. So, imagine or pretend that there is a past life, and in one of your past lives this person had been the most loving and caring mother possible to you.

a. Note: In this meditation it is not the person as you know them now. It is the essence of this person in a past life where they were an entirely different person, and they were the ultimate, perfect loving mother to you. You want to imagine the most ideal loving wonderful mother and then think that the essence of that perfect mother is actually this person you are thinking of from this life. So, that essence of your friend is inside that mother at her core. We’re imagining that they are just in a different form, but the essence is the same. So, see this wonderful loving mother and tell yourself it is actually the person you know or are thinking about, but in a different guise in a past life.

b. Note: This imagined perfect mother in a past life is also not the same as your experience of your mother in this life. Imagine that in a past life you had just the most terrific, completely flawless, perfectly loving and caring mother.

3. With that in mind, see this mother as she is making every sacrifice, doing everything she can at every step in your life to make sure that nothing terrible could ever happen to you. For example, you might imagine that you are about to stumble in front of a wagon and she scoops you up. Or, as a baby who doesn’t know better that you are going to put your hand in a fire, and she pulls it away. Or, somebody is mean to you, and she makes that person stop it. See times in your past life when you are sad, and she comforts you. Or, see all the times when you are hungry, and she is making meals for you. So, you are imagining all the different ways that this mother in a past life is being so loving and kind to you. Feel how much she cares for you. You can think about different things she might have done for you at different stages in this past life. Experience them as if they are happening to you at that age in your life in real time.

4. Then, think if you were that child in a past life receiving so much kind love and caring, how grateful you would have been to her. So, think how grateful you would have been when they were taking such kind care of you when you were a child. Imagine this terrifically loving relationship where you are being showered with love and care from this mother, and let feelings of gratitude rise up in you. See yourself responding with words to her, such as “Thank you, Mommy! Thank you.” Just feel how grateful you would be.

5. Now, you are going to try this process again thinking about another person you like or whom you think cares about you. Try the whole thing all over again in your mind. Take the essence of that person. Imagine that you are in another lifetime, and that in that past life that this person was a perfectly wonderful, loving and kind mother for you.

6. See all the kind things they are doing for you. Imagine all this kindness and care showering on you

i. NOTE: Remember that they don’t have the face or personality as they are now. They are in the mode and the being of a perfect, perfect mother.

7. Imagine how loved and how grateful you’d feel as a result. Experience this feeling of gratitude. Let it rise up in you and come back to this mother. You’d want to do anything for her because she had been so kind to you. See the love coming into you and evoking a response of love and gratitude in you towards your mother.

8. If you can, throughout your day (or through the coming week if you want to continue to work with this practice) try this visualization out repeatedly by thinking of other people with whom you come in contact who seem kind to you. Look at them and think: “What if that person in a past life had been my mother and had been so incredibly kind to me? Boy, I would have been so grateful!”

I hope that that starts some wheels turning in your mind and starts your heart opening and that the compassion-generating dynamic is starting to move within you.

Before you move on with your day, please wrap up this compassion practice by following the “Seal with a Vow & Rejoice” meditation on page xx.

Short Form

1. Bring your spiritual support figure to the forefront of your mind and imagine them being happy to see your good intention to develop a more peaceful and compassionate mind. As you go through the following meditation think that this being or person is supporting you with loving, compassionate, and peaceful thoughts and energy.

2. Think about a friend or someone you like very much.

3. Imagine that in a past life this person had been the most loving and caring mother to you conceivable.

4. Imagine that this person made every sacrifice possible to shield you from danger, comfort you in sadness, and attend to your every need.

5. Then, think about how grateful you would have been to this person when they were taking such kind care of you when you were a child.

6. Now, try this in your mind as much as possible thinking about other people you like or consider as friends.

7. Finish by imagining making an aspiration to protect and further any new peaceful and compassionate ways of thinking and imagine that they are stored in a flower at your heart center. See your spiritual support figure smiling at you and rejoicing that you have turned your mind towards greater peace and compassion.

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